Quiet quitting / Quiet hiring

With all the burnout from working short staffed for years I have seen some of my co-workers slowly start to “slack off” in response to the constant addition of more responsibilities because there simply is not enough people to do the work. I thought this was just a unique thing for healthcare since we lost so much staff during the pandemic and people are reluctant to work in healthcare now that it has passed. I know pretty much everywhere is hiring, many with signing bonuses and other things to sweeten the pot and attract workers but this is not unique to healthcare. It appears to be happening in ALL industries.

How did this happen? Where did all the workers go? How are people supporting themselves and their families without jobs? Why are people not applying for the open jobs?

I understood at first that some people were afraid to come out from their bubbles and rejoin the world. This left the workforce a bit short staffed with current employees struggling to cover the workload for the open jobs waiting for applicants. Apparently when additional work is assigned without any additional compensation it is called “quiet hiring”. I had never heard of this before. It is definitely a practice that needs to stop. It leads to burnout. Burnout leads to “quiet quitting” where employees still show up but do less and less work. The problem is that then others end up picking up the slack even more leading to even more burn out.

That brings us to where we are today. People are working mandatory overtime that they do not want with those employed working 10-12 hour days 5+ days a week in some cases for weeks without a day off just to cover the workload. No wonder people are burnt out. Vacations and sick calls are not covered just leading to more short staffing issues. *IF* you can actually get approved to take a vacation day. Most places are so short staffed they stopped approving time off due to “staffing issues”. So employees just call in sick… or just don’t show up for work. After all…What are they going to do? Fire you? Ha! They are already so short staffed that they need you even if you call in sick every Friday or just don’t show up for work then post photos of yourself on Facebook enjoying the beach in Cancun living your best life while your co-workers cover your work. (yeah, that just happened at my job in the last month).

So what is the solution? Until the staffing shortages can be fixed employees who show up and work hard should be treated and compensated better. Perhaps instead of forcing overtime on the companies terms let employees volunteer to to the additional work on their terms and possibly do some work from home or offer flexible hours so the work gets done but allows them to have a better balance. Maybe someone is a night owl and would rather work after their kids go to bed or they are an early riser and would rather come in early. Maybe instead of having hiring bonuses there should be retention bonuses and the wages that would have been paid to all the people who would have been working all the open positions should be added up together and divided among the hours worked by current staff so everyone gets a portion based on the numbers of hours they worked. It wouldn’t be much, but it is better than nothing. Even if it just covers that afternoon espresso to make it through the day it is a nice gesture. It should be by department based on the number of open jobs they have. So if your department is currently fully staffed, your employees are not working short and therefore are not eligible for the bonus. But if you are 2 people covering the work of 5 or 30 people covering the work of 34 that bonus will be proportional to the amount of extra work you are having to cover. Those who are covering more work should be compensated more…and that is in addition to the overtime needed to do the job. It may not cause overtime in the case of the 30 people covering the work of 34, but for those 2 people doing the work of 5…that is impossible without at least a little overtime.

So why talk about this? Well, it is something that really hits home for me. In my above example I am one of the 2 doing the work of 5…and my coworker just had surgery and will be off work for 3-4 months. I am now alone. Responsible for the workload of 5 people. We have open jobs with ZERO applicants. One of the jobs has been open for a few years, one has been open for 2 years and another for about a year and they will shortly be adding a 4th open job to cover the workload I am shouldering alone. I can work as much overtime as I want and I am currently working 50-60 hour weeks. I work until I am tired because I am NEVER finished. I come in early and work late every day and if I don’t have any plans I come in on Saturdays too.

I’m exhausted. I’m bitter. I don’t like to talk about work or think about work when I am not at work because it is so miserable. But the first thing most people ask me is “how’s work?” People seem to not understand just how bad the staffing situation is in some places, especially those who are not working or are working remote and not in an office environment. To most people my work situation sounds like a tall tale, but it is in fact very real. The one person who applied for the job was walked over to meet me in the interview and I was behind, breaking a sweat with people coming at me from all sides wanting things. They declined the job. I have requested that the next interview be just before the lunch hour so it is calmer and we don’t scare them away if anyone else applies for any of the open jobs.

Until we are fully staffed, I will just do what I can and hopefully people will understand that I am only one person. I will also fixate on my next vacation about a year from now. Knowing that work will not be my problem for at least 10 days when I return to the UK…This time with my husband for his first trip there.

Reminders

Is it just me or are grown adults unable to keep a calendar now?

I understand I’m a planner. My husband and I have a family calendar linked together on our phones to make sure that we are both on top of everything going on with each other and the kids. Dr appointments, school, events ect are all on this calendar (color coded for who’s event it is of course). This way at a glance we can see what all of us are doing for the day. In addition I have an old paper planner that I use to coordinate all I need to do between work, my photography, projects, volunteer work and other side hustle endeavors I’m working on. I have a lot of spoons in a lot of pots so I need something more than just appointments on the calendar.

This brings me to adults not being able to keep a calendar. Seriously, what is going on with that? I honestly do not need multiple reminders that I have a dentist appointment (currently the booking confirmation, 1 month reminder, 2 week reminder, 1 week reminder, 3 day reminder, 24 hour reminder and I know tomorrow I’ll get yet another reminder within a few hours of my appointment). Seriously, just send me the booking confirmation so I know we are on the same page and I’ll add it to my calendar. I’m a grown adult. I can read. I can keep track of when I need to be somewhere.

Sadly, I feel like I am in the minority now. I have a few friends who like me, keep a calendar and keep track of our schedules. But others just seem to think they are going to just remember everything and are constantly forgetting events, double or multiply booking themselves. Granted, I have one friend who just says “yes” to everything then seems to wait until the day of then only actually shows up to whatever she deems the most worth doing and skips everything else with a lame excuse. After a while we figured out her MO and I just stopped inviting her to things because she is so unreliable.

Anyway, back to all the reminders… is this a chicken and egg situation? Have people started using multiple reminders because people are unable to keep a calendar and just do what they want when they want without any consideration to a schedule (like my above mentioned friend) or did the multiple reminders for things make it so people no longer feel like they need to keep a calendar because the 487 reminders will tell them what they need to do and when.

When did we become people that constantly need to be reminded of everything? Now I’m not saying I never forget anything. Hell, this morning I forgot what I wanted to add to the grocery order between the kitchen and the living room where I left my phone. But my dentist appointment is on my joint calendar with my husband on my phone so he knows what’s going on. It’s in my personal planner so I remember when planning out what I need to do. Since it is mid-day tomorrow it is also on my work calendar so I remember to head over there at the end of lunch. I don’t need a 3rd party to remind me. I got this. I’m a responsible adult.

I know there are other responsible adults out there. I feel the majority of us can claim that title. But as in most things, the few ruin it for the many. I have to deal with multiple reminders (usually email and text. Sometimes email, text and phone call (like the portrait studio I take the kids to). At work I know the computer system sends out multiple reminders. But yet I still get patients who miss their appointments saying they forgot. How do you forget? You got at least 9 reminders probably 11 if you do online check in. Yet I still had my 3pm patient (my last patient of the day) show up at 4:25 on Friday (I’m off at 4pm). I was still there finishing up my last minute phone calls but my co worker saw him. My exam room is right next to my office so I heard him say that he got busy at work but knew as long as he got there before I left at 5 I’d see him. My co worker then told him that I’m off at 4, not 5. This is not an isolated incident. People come in all the time on the wrong day, wrong time, 1+ hours late because they were “busy” at the appointment time but decided to just come in at a time that worked for them fully knowing it was not their appointment. Now if people are early I’ll do all I can to see them early. But if they are more than 30 min late for their 15 min appointment I have already moved on.

Sometimes, it’s a situation where a road is closed and everyone is super late, in that case I take them as they get in but if you are just an irresponsible, inconsiderate jerk that just shows up whenever you want with zero regard for anyone else’s schedule you can rebook. It has become a massive problem not just at my job but everywhere. I see people come in super late for nail appointments or just walk in without an appointment and then walk out because they will need to wait to be fit in and the 10 minute wait is just too long. No one understands how busy they are…Really? 10 minutes is too long? Well, if you can’t wait 10 minutes to be worked in you do not have time for a manicure anyway. I have also been on the other side where I had an appointment, was there on time but had to wait a long time because so many people were late or showed up without an appointment and demanded to be fit in.

Why not just book an appointment and, well actually show up on time for it?

Why not note your appointments and obligations down in a calendar so you do not forget. You can set a reminder on your phone just incase you get busy. I set an alarm on my watch to go off when I need to remember that I have something at a particular time because life happens. We all get busy. But I am a responsible adult. I do not need a babysitter. I wish I could just opt out of all reminders and just get my confirmation and nothing else.

And it’s all back…

Yep. I gained it all back… plus an additional 2 lbs after Easter. But, this setback isn’t stopping me. The Monday after Easter I weighed in again, drew the line in the sand and started over.

Is it upsetting? Absolutely! But I didn’t get this fat overnight so I’m not going to get in shape overnight either. When setbacks happen the important thing is to get back up and try again. Do not give up…Even if you are now 2 lbs higher than your starting weight.

My first step was to get my eating habits in order. Things went downhill when I got my braces out on. My bite is off. It’s hard to chew. Everything gets stuck in them. My previous healthy eating habits of carrots, celery, apples and nuts as snacks all went away as I struggled to learn what I can and can’t eat with these stupid things stuck on my teeth.

2 months later I have it figured out. All the above snacks are still a no-go, but I have substituted other options. I’m happy to say that I think I have it down now and I’m happy to say that I have lost a total of 7 lbs!

Ok, I still have a very long way to go to my goal. But this is not a “loose a quick 5-10 lbs to look better in a bikini” situation. This is a I spent 9 months in a wheelchair, had to learn to walk again, then had 2 babies and just when I was getting into my groove the pandemic hit, the gym closed and I started working oodles of unwanted mandatory overtime for 3 years situation. It’s been a struggle. Life has happened. My weight creeped up over time and it will come off over time as well. I need to adjust to the changes that happen and move on. This is one of those times. I need to adjust.

With my eating habits under control my next step is to figure out how to add in more exercise. It’s a balancing act. My work schedule has changed. I canceled my gym membership because I just could not make it work with my schedule. So now I am walking. Every day when I get home from work I go for a walk before I go inside the house. So far that is working but I’ll need to see how I feel when it’s 100+ degrees in the summer. I may need to adjust again then.

I still want to add in yoga again. My practice has just not been there since the studio by my house closed…and the backup studio I liked closed…and the farther studio closed… and the classes at the community center stopped and so far have not re-started. Finding time to fit in a regular practice again has been on my “to do” list for a while. When there is a class the time and date is set. I stick with it. When I am just doing it at home my follow through is poor. It may seem strange but I just can’t get out of my head. I have to find a place to practice, then usually clean the floor (I have a dog and small kids). With the same dog/kid situation the place I find needs to be away from them or else I get the dog licking my face and the kids jumping on me. Then if the stars align and I start to practice I get distracted by things I need to do. I need to get out of the house to clear my mind.

So that is where I am. Back to square 1. Starting over. But the key is…I didn’t give up. I regrouped and started again.

Covid has finally hit our home

Rumor is that the pandemic is going to be declared over soon. Up until now we have managed to avoid getting it… So, when it hit our home it wasn’t even the kids that brought it into our home or me working in patient care… It was my husband, who rarely goes anywhere. We have no idea where he picked it up since I am the one who is always out and about. All and all he has a pretty mild case. Fever for a few days, but not super high. The cough is probably the worst part for him. The kids are pretty mild. occasional cough, no fever. I am still negative and symptom free. How did this happen?

Apparently, we are not immune. Well, I might be.

I personally can’t wait to move on to post-pandemic bliss where we worry about something other than germs. I’m looking forward to masking going away and seeing peoples faces again. I hope the plexiglass barriers go away so I can hear what cashiers are saying again. I look forward to not yelling all the time so people can hear me through the mask and plastic barrier.

I miss pre-pandemic life…and pre-pandemic prices. But it isn’t all negative. I’m just going to say it… I LOVE curbside pickup! I love being able to get pretty much anything delivered. As a busy mom, not having to park, go into a store, shop, checkout and go back out to my car and just being able to order what I want and just pull into the designated area and pick my items up is amazing! I am hoping to never go grocery shopping again. Having someone do it for me then drop it off at my house is the best thing ever!

I’m looking forward to business hours going back to normal so I can enjoy supporting small businesses again. I don’t know about everyone else, but having places closed on Sundays and evenings is tough for me. Saturdays are often busy with events so I run errands on Sundays. Now I may eventually get use to this but after years of only the post office, Chick-fil-a and Hobby Lobby being closed on Sundays other places that use to be open all weekend (or open until 6-8pm) being closed now is apparently hard for me to get use to. I guess I’m just an old dog now and having trouble adjusting.

Maybe this is the “new normal”.

Maybe this is just temporary until people go back to work and places are fully staffed.

Maybe I just need to learn to check the hours of places before I’m standing at the locked door looking for the hours…yeah, it’s probably this one.

Honestly, this is not a new thing for me. I have often wondered why so many places don’t open until 10 or 11. I’m usually up, dressed and ready to start my day by 7 on the weekends (6 on weekdays because I start work at 7:30 AM) who are these people who don’t get out of the house until 11? By 11 I’m usually hungry and trying to figure out what I want for lunch.

So for this year I’m going to try something new… check the hours and days places are open before I go.

Aging and New Beginnings

Recently I seem to be having a lot of conversations with my friends about the future. It seems as if many people are unsure about what to do with the rest of their lives and are rethinking things post-pandemic. Some are looking at changing their jobs, moving somewhere new, going back to school, and starting or ending relationships. We are not talking about small changes, but large ones. Has the pandemic shown us life is too short to not be happy? Are we under more pressure than usual? Or are people just more open to other options and more willing to make changes?

Honestly, it is hard to know. People have always made changes, but it seems like there are more people making big changes than there was pre-pandemic. I get it. Looking at my own life I would love to just uproot and move somewhere else. Living in California, I am so tired of the homeless encampments everywhere, the fires, the horrible road conditions, the poor schools, high cost of living and so many other things that a move to somewhere else sounds like a dream. I also know that I have less than a decade to my house being paid off. I love the beaches, mountains and beauty of the nature areas of this state. I love the availability and variety of fresh produce and the cultural diversity of the area. My job is also here…Although if I get a good enough offer I will be out of that door so fast… So I get the job changes too.

The long term staffing shortages have gotten REALLY old and there is no end in site either. People are now refusing to volunteer for overtime anymore. Management is just accepting it right now…But, I can see the mandatory overtime coming soon again, probably by April. I am not looking forward to that day. The last few times the mandatory period lasted at least 6 months but it seems to run for about 9 months with the holidays free of mandatory overtime in November, December and January. In a dream world, If I can find a job with similar pay and benefits I would leave. If I get offered a job where I can have flexible hours and work remotely I would even be willing to take less money and less time off.

I can see why people are wondering “Where do I go from here?” I can see why they are looking at all areas of their lives and making changes. I have had time to think about my life in the closures and the time after and there are changes I want to make as well even though I am happy overall. Even I can see where there is room for improvement.

To all those pondering a change… I wish you luck and happiness.

My weight loss journey-November update

It has been a while since I have updated my progress. Not that it hasn’t been on my mind but life happens…in my case work.

I’m sure I have mentioned my hatred of the insane workloads and all the mandatory overtime with all the 12 hour days and 6 day weeks. Finally September arrived and my coworker took the overtime allowing me a bit of normalcy back in my life.

Then the day from hell happened and I finally cracked. I got to work at 7:30 AM as usual and the alarm was going off. With the engineers on strike there was no one to turn them off. It took until 3:30 in the afternoon to get the alarm shut off. Also the AC was stuck on Arctic blast and our department was 56 degrees…also unable to be fixed. By the time I left work at 4:30 I was in tears. My nerves were shot. My eyelids were twitching and I had a pounding headache.

I go home and still feel like hell. My Blood pressure is high so I go to bed. Surely I’ll feel better in the morning. I wake up the next day (a Saturday) and my husband tells me “happy weekend! You don’t have to go to work today!” I start crying. My pulse starts racing. I can’t get it together. So he gets up and tells me to take my time. He will get the kids up and start breakfast.

I can’t get it under control. I try to get out of the house and take one of my kids to the pumpkin patch and start having chest pain. I think this is it. That place is actually killing me. I turn around, take my son home and go to the ER.

I get a full work up to make sure I am not actually dying and end up with a diagnosis of extreme stress, a chill pill and a follow up with my medical dr who then takes me off work and puts me on anxiety medicine to try to help me get under control.

A few weeks later I’m starting to feel human again. I made some changes at work (including actively looking for another job). I slowed down and I get done what I get done. If people need to wait oh well. Maybe they should hire enough staff to cover the volume of work that needs to be done. I’m fully booked to the end of the year. Today I started the pile of consults that need to be seen but there’s nowhere to put them. I’m not overbooking myself again so people get seen in a timely manner.

I am also waiting on a surgery date in January for carpal tunnel surgery. So I’m not booking anyone in January until I get that date. I’ll book up to that day…when I get it.

Even with all that is going on and Halloween I still managed to loose just shy of 6 lbs in October. I’m hoping I can continue to slowly loose the weight through the holidays because overtime just started up again with today as my first 12 hour day again. I agreed to 1 a week and I choose what day it is and no more Saturdays.

I’m really hoping I get the job I applied for a few days ago. It is my light at the end of the tunnel. 20 min commute vs 1 hour, 1/4 the patient load and higher pay. At first I was thinking I would maybe pick up 1 Saturday a month to help my current coworker…but my husband is right. I’m already detaching from that job in hopes of getting this new one. Once I leave, I will not be back. That mess is their problem, not mine.

Not my monkeys, not my circus.

I just keep focused on the light, think positive and hope like hell that I get that job and can move on.

It came up too fast and now it’s over…

Well, that time is here and gone. I was planning on a slim, sexy body for my brothers wedding and while I failed at that, I am about 35 lbs lighter than when I started and still looked better than if I was 35 lbs heavier. As an added bonus all the running around and dancing left me 4 lbs lighter after the 4 day weekend.

I’m not stopping here. I am still determined to get back into shape. The pandemic may have thrown me a curve ball but I’m slowly working on it. One this this weekend has shown me is that my day job, commute and lack of movement on weekdays is really what is stopping me from being fit and fabulous.

I need to figure out how to add exercise to my weekdays sans-gym. Even moderately active will be an improvement on my 3000 steps a day I get chained to my computer. I need to figure out something to get moving to reach my goal of being fabulously fit at 50. (I have 36 months to make this happen, but I’m aiming for 24 or less so I have it off for a year before my 50th)

It is said that a journey of 1000 miles begins with a first step. Tomorrow I’m taking that first step and going back to my mosquito, wild animal walks around the park and back in the mornings. I have insect repellent and pepper spray. So as long as I don’t spook a skunk or come face to face with the bobcat or mountain lion that occasionally wander our neighborhood I should be good. (I have only seen the bobcat. But my friend a couple streets over has seen the mountain lion ahhh the joys of living close to nature)

36 months to 50…

I got this!

My weight loss journey-the hubby joins me

Things are returning to “normal” in our house. The kids are back in school and my coworker is trying to buy her 1st home and actually wants to work ALL of the overtime until she is settled and I am happy to let her! With this weeks overtime behind me and no more in the future I’m feeling human again.

With my husband on board with the weight loss it is making my life easier with less temptation. Our new fridge was delivered a week ago (the old one finally died.) so we are stocking back up on healthy food and cooking at home. It was rough going for the few weeks between “fridge isn’t working” and “new one is here” but we survived.

My hurdle now is exercise. With masking back at the gym it’s a no-go. I can’t do cardio in a mask. I already wheeze like crazy without the mask adding to my struggle. I was full on ready to get back to my walking around the park and back then the fires started and now the air quality is “chunky” with a mist of ash falling constantly. I’m pretty sure the smoke and ash are not good for my lungs. My current plan is to skip cardio and work on my core and stretching until masking at the gym goes away or the air is breathable outside again.

Halfway through august and I’m down 3 lbs so far. At least it’s going in the right direction.

My weight loss journey-July 2021

Holy setbacks Batman!

Thankfully I only gained 1 lb in July and that is a miracle. Between the 4th of July holiday weekend and the 60+ hour work weeks I am amazed that is all I gained. I’m the type of person who draws a line in the sand, regroups and starts over. That is what August was going to be for me…a fresh start. With the overtime behind me I’m getting back to my meal planning and back to the gym! I had a plan…and it was a good one then Thursday, July 29th I get told that the overtime is going to continue through August oh, and by the way you are working on Saturday too. I almost cried.

My work week has been 8-5 Monday, 8-7:30 Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday then back to 8-5 Friday and Saturday. Yes, you read that right…6 days a week and three 11.5 hour days. Oh, and I have an hour commute each way. I’m struggling. I’m exhausted. I’m desperately trying to regroup and try to figure out how I can make this work. My decision…food is key. I just do not have time or energy to exercise so my diet needs to be near perfect.

I have had suggestions from fit people I know try to help me figure out how to fit exercise in my day. I’m up by 5:30 AM and leave the house about 6:30 AM and get home around 6 or 8:30 PM depending on the day. I get ready for bed at 9 and I’m asleep somewhere between 10-11pm. Giving me 5.5-7.5 hours sleep depending on the night. My early days I spend as much time as possible with the kids before they go to bed because I don’t see them at all on my late days. That is honestly the hardest part…not seeing the kids.

So I average about 6.5 hours of sleep a night and I’m at work, commuting or with my kids the other part. What do I give up? Work is set and I don’t want to work the OT as it is, but it isn’t optional. Sleep? I’m exhausted as it is. Time with my kids…yeah, I’ll give up sleep first. My kids are still little and they grow up so fast. I’m not making excuses. It’s just my reality. I have pondered this trying to work out a solution on those many hours commuting. I have goals so I was going to cut my gym time down to 30 min. But as if the OT wasn’t crushing enough Friday I get an email from the gym saying they are going back to mandatory masking for everyone while in the building vaccinated or not as of August 1st. That sealed the deal for me and I put my membership on hold.

So that’s where I am. My first month that I did not loose anything and actually gained a pound. I am determined NOT to gain anything in the month of August and my goal is to lose at least 4 lbs with diet alone. I’ll check in again at the beginning of September with an update.

When a “day off” not really an actual day of rest

At some point “days off” work didn’t actually become a restful day to recuperate from work and enjoy life but they became just more work. It starts slow. You do your laundry, get groceries or run a few errands but easily have time to hit happy hour, grab lunch with a friend and catch a movie or go to the park with your family. My life has not been like that in some time now. It makes me wonder what happened? I see photos on Facebook of people out doing all kinds of things but not me. I always seem to be busy. Now, I’m not saying that I never get out, because I do. Just not as often as most other people.

I knew I was busy but I didn’t really understand until a few days ago. I took a day off of work so my husband could go to the dentist. He would not be done in time to get the kids off the bus so I took the day off of work. Now, my thought was I have a lot of things I need to get caught up for my photography business on so I’ll just get up like I’m going to work and pop open my laptop in the living room and get some work done. 13 hours later I finally got caught up…kinda. I still have more to do. There is always more to do.

Now I’m behind on my blog posts. How did this happen? Well…I have been busy. We are behind at work so there has been a lot of overtime. We had several people quit to take care of their kids when the schools did not reopen in the fall. No one has applied for those open jobs in almost a year now. Because we have been working short staffed we now have 4 people out injured (I will be joining them briefly when I have my carpal tunnel surgery after the kids are back in school). All of these vacancies have now brought us to the point that we have been opening for Saturday appointments for the last 3 months to try to catch up and now this month we are opening in the evenings too. So in an effort to be a team player I have been working from 7:30AM-7:30PM 4 days a week and 7:30-5 on Fridays. My coworker has been working 6 days a week taking the Saturdays since she works from 8:30-5 on weekdays. Add in my kids, photography business, household chores and getting up at 4:30 AM to get to the gym (that just opened on June 15th) before work and I am one busy, exhausted woman.

So I started looking at those relaxed, refreshed people out enjoying life all the time and wondered what they have in common. What are they doing (or not doing) that allows them to just chill out? With 1 exception the thing they all have in common is lack of a job. They have someone else providing the money they live on. About half have a minimal gig they do from selling something from a MLM of some sort or teaching an occasional class on something. By minimal I’m talking 1-2 days a week for about 2 hours actually working. Something to give them something to do. All have teenage or older kids. Only one had a full time job but her kids are grown and out of the house and no grandkids yet.

This made me realize that I’m not being fair to myself. I’m not comparing apples to apples. These women are not gone from the home almost 70 hours a week commuting or at work. Most days I’m commuting or at work for 15 of the 24 hours in a day. 9 hours to sleep, shower and go to the gym. No wonder I look exhausted. The 6 hours of sleep I get a night keeps me functional but not relaxed and refreshed. Makeup? What’s that? I’m lucky to just have clean laundry for everyone and groceries in the house (that I have delivered because I do not have time to shop). I’m not one of these women. I will not be one of them until my kids are grown and I’m retired. So until that point, I am ok and doing pretty good managing it all like so many others out there. The apples can stay apples. I’m ok being an orange. Maybe someday soon I can pull it all together for a day at the beach…