hopes – Working Mom – Travel Dreams

Happy New Year!

So you may be wondering what the plans are for 2025. It’s going to be a full year!

Starting out, my husband has decided to start running again with his old running group with a goal of doing a few half-marathons this year and moving up to full marathons again in 2026. I have agreed to do the half marathon when he does the full at races in fun destinations to make a mini getaway for us. I’m NOT joining the running group. I hate running. But I walk faster than most people jog so I’m walking them. I figure my triathlon training is enough to keep me in shape to do a half marathon without any extra work specific to those races. I may be wrong, but since I already have “running” as part of my triathlon training and I’m use to endurance races I’m just going to go with it. 😁

Now let’s talk travel… we are starting 2025 by taking the kids to Great Wolf Lodge. May the odds be ever in our favor while traveling with 2 kids with Autism and taking them away from their routine.

Up next is Cabo San Lucas sans-kids for our anniversary. This will be a different trip there for my husband who is ready to step out of his comfort zone and try some new things. Our previous trips to Cabo together started with 2 days there on a cruise where I was super big and pregnant with our 1st son. We made it back home with 3 days to spare before I was too far along in my pregnancy to travel internationally. I may have freaked him out a bit by doing pretty much all the stuff they tell you NOT to do on the cruise ship. But I was too big and too hot to care and have been to Cabo more times than I can count prior to that trip. The 2nd trip there was for our anniversary during Covid where we only left the resort once. But we left it and survived and I didn’t freak him out too much probably due to the tequila tasting I took him to first before venturing out. Liquid courage did wonders for his nerves.

So this trip he said he is ready to travel my way and try new things. I asked him if he was sure because once I book it he is stuck. He thought about it and the next day he said he was ready. I immediately booked us in a small boutique hotel with only 8 rooms with a great location. I had to book it all in Spanish. Thankfully, I speak “travel” in many languages and Spanish is my strongest. Up next was choosing activities. Since he apparently grew up under a rock he really has not done much so we are doing it all! ATVs in the desert, riding camels, parasailing, glass bottom boat tour, glass blowing, shopping, bar hopping, a cooking class, hiking to El Arco, a street food tour… it will be a trip full of adventure by day and relaxing evenings sipping margaritas and laughing the night away.

If you follow my blog you know my husband is NOT a traveler but very much wants to be one. Getting him to this point has not been easy. He slowly learning how to pack (although I can’t seem to get him to travel light as I do so every time we go somewhere I get annoyed waiting for him to 1. Check his bag and 2. Get his bag after the flight) I will occasionally need to check a bag because I have something that I can’t put in my carry on bag like when I had several knives to bring home from Nepal. Or when I have a bit too much to drink and go shopping and purchase bottles of booze that I need to bring home. (Or a case or two plus loose bottles) It annoys me when I have to check a bag or more too.

Enough about Mexico. Let’s talk about the couples trip for special needs parents that my husband and I are leading. We started out by hosting a monthly “parents night out” for the special needs parents group we are part of locally. It has gone really well for a few years now but have been asked for more. There is a Moms retreat. But not much else. It’s difficult to get away as a couple when you have typical kids but with special needs kids it is almost impossible. So with the success of parents night out, we are attempting a getaway for parents to be themselves among others who “get it”. We chose Catalina Island off the coast of California as our destination for a long weekend getaway. It’s far enough to be “away” but close enough that if things go really bad at home we can all make it back fairly easy. So far we have 7 couples excited about going with rooms already booked.

The day after we get home from Catalina I leave to go to the UK with one of my best friends to celebrate her 50th birthday. She watches our kids for us when we go out of town so we don’t have to pay a sitter to sleep and without her help, we would never be able to go anywhere overnight together. Going to the UK has been at the top of her bucket list for as long as I have known her. So as her 50th birthday approached I asked my husband if it would be ok if I took her as a thank you for watching the kids. I usually take her out somewhere for her birthday every year even if it’s just lunch but with it being 50 I wanted to do something big. He agreed *if* I could stay within a budget and not get crazy. Honestly, I think he thought I couldn’t make it work. But as an old school budget traveler and backpacker I got this! When I told her she cried she was so happy. I told her to stay within the budget she would need to pay for her own airfare (that may be as much as $1200, but I’ll look for the best deal I can find for a direct flight…actual total $662.81 each round trip from San Francisco to London 😎) but I got the rest. We are working on what to do with our week there now. I have a plan that I think she will love but told her to give me her top “must see” list soon so I can get started booking and fit in as many of those places as I can.

With 2025 plans looking good so far I was talking to my friend in Australia about our next meet up and when and where to go. My 2025 is pretty full but 2026 is open. We each looked at a world map and decided that we want warmer over colder and somewhere cheap and not too touristy that was not over 24 hours of travel for each of us to get there. Things always get weird when we try to get together since we live on complete opposite sides of the planet I don’t think we could be farther apart from each other. After a couple days of crossing off countries from our list we finally decided on Indonesia. (Yeah, we are both very well traveled and actually met in Egypt. So, while most people could not even tell us where Indonesia is we were both into the idea.) Today I approached my husband with the idea of me going solo to Indonesia to meet up with my friend from the land down under. Cringing because I’m already going to the UK…again with another friend this year and expecting a lecture about saving money and trying to pay off the house early…but surprisingly he was great with it. He said it has been too long since we got together and are well overdue for it. And apparently he was watching a video on YouTube recently that said Indonesia is a totally underrated and affordable travel destination (as apparently are several other places I keep talking about going to. Apparently I have good taste.) So, I sent her a quick message and told her “project Indonesia 2026 is a go”.

So that wraps up 2025 plans and gives you a sneak peek at 2026 plans starting to form. I know 2026 seems far away but it will be here sooner than you think and I find that I do more and see more if I have a plan. So, with 2025 mostly booked it’s time to start my general outline for 2026.

Happy New Year to all my readers. I hope if you don’t have plans for 2025 and beyond yet that I have inspired you to make some. After all… life is what happens when you get off the couch.

Achieving my dream of one day going to Tibet

How do I get THERE from HERE?!?

When you look into your ideal future what do you see?

This is the question I ask myself every year around my birthday. I don’t do New years resolutions. I set goals every year to be achieved by the next year and on the 5’s and the 0’s I set 5 year goals too and if I am making a big change that is when it happens. I will sometimes fall a bit short of my goals but I almost always meet them. These goals are not the typical “loose weight” or “quit smoking” ect that so many people resolve to do. My goals are more…well…They are just different.

My annual goals tend to be achieving something on my bucket list before my next birthday, starting or finishing something. These are goals that I can achieve in a year or less. I have set goals like getting SCUBA certified, getting my passport and booking my first international trip, learn to play the piano ect. All of those I have achieved. Some (like learning to fold a fitted sheet) are just beyond my capabilities. Some were really hard like learning to walk without my cane after shattering my leg and spending 6 months in a wheelchair and another 6 months learning to walk again. 12 years later I am still really slow going down stairs and need the handrail but I can walk without a cane.

As for my 5 year goals they are bigger, life changing things. I dropped all my friends that I felt were pulling me down and got new friends. I purchased a house…twice. My 5 year goals are things that change my life and take a while to accomplish.

So why this talk of goals? I turned 50 this year. It is a massive milestone birthday. I celebrated with an epic adventure but that has me thinking…What changes do I want to make in my life? Overall, I am pretty happy with things. Of course I LOVE to win the lottery and spend my days lounging on tropical beaches but that isn’t really a goal I can set for myself. I did set a goal a while back to invest more into my retirement so I can retire well when I finally do. I’m still on track there and my retirement should include some lounging in the tropics. But that leaves me wondering what do I want to achieve between 50 and 55?

Write a book? Kids book, novel, how to? Learn a new language? What language? Learn a new skill? What skill? Honestly, I am hoping to come up with something new soon. Because I don’t just decide “I’m going to learn to play the piano!” My goal also comes with a plan. It is not just a statement. I need to figure it out. I need to make a plan.

I’m actually pretty happy with my life and don’t need any big changes. I’ll keep working on my health. I’ll keep working on being debt free…including paying my mortgage off early. My retirement savings is actually ahead of where I need to be thanks to early plans there.

So for the first time I’m a bit stuck. it looks like I’ll just be refining my current goals and tweaking them a bit.

Pay off my car and house are in the plan (car in the next 3 years, house in I think 6 more years. I don’t think I can cram it into 5.) Not bad goals since I just got my car in March and we got our house in 2016.

I’m still working on getting in shape but I’m down 100 lbs and have about 40 more to go. I want to add in yoga and strength training…somehow.

I want some social goals maybe a date day, family day and a friend day each once a month. It’s easy to get busy and just let the fun stuff slide. Something creative too… I think I’m going to try to learn to crochet. I found a local group that meets 5 min from my house once a month. I think I’ll start there.

Travel goals are always fun to work on. I think the next big trip will be to Japan. There will be other smaller ones before that, but I can start figuring out what we want to do and getting an idea of how much time we will need and a general budget.

I’ll be meeting with a friend next week who is also working on goal setting to talk about our plans. It will be interesting since I have never worked on my goals with anyone but my husband when working on our shared goals like buying the house and paying off the credit cards or things we need help with like working out our training plans (marathons for him and triathlons for me) so one of us is home with the kids…although I think we are both going to do our long runs/long rides on Saturday mornings and get a sitter to leave Sundays free for us to do stuff together as a family. It’s an idea we are working on vs one going early and the other going later or one on Saturday and one on Sunday. I like to wait until the sun is up and the fog has cleared before I get out there on my bike. I prefer NOT to crash into potholes or get hit by cars.

Anyway, so that is the start of the plan. It all starts with general ideas. Then I form a plan on what changes need to happen to make it real. I choose steps and set goals and get a plan in place. It eventually all comes together. That is the part I’m working on with my friend. She has the ideas, but figuring out the steps to make those dreams a reality is what is hard for her.

Giving Thanks – Attitude of Gratitude

I have never been good at being thankful for what I have because I am so focused on my goals for the future that I often do not take a minute to appreciate what I have or all I have accomplished to this point. The exception… Thanksgiving. Maybe it is the forced relaxation after the feast is over and I settle in on the couch with my 2nd helping of pie… Because lets face it, I just do not have space for all the desserts in one sitting. Maybe it is just the holiday in general that makes me reflect. One thing is sure, I will look at my life and be thankful of what I have on this one day out of the year.

I can’t even tell you how many gratitude journals I have purchased in all different forms through the years to help me be more in the moment and appreciate what I have. Not that I have actually used any of them… But the intention is there. I want to be that person. I want to journal about my day. I want to reflect and be thankful for what I have. I want to be all zen and in the moment thankful for the life I have… But my mind will not let me.

My mind goes 100 MPH zipping through goals and to do lists and thinking about what is next to the point that I have a hard time being in the now. Breathe in… Did I put bread on my grocery list? I need to texture that hole I patched in the wall… Where is the paint? Oh that’s right… Breathe out. I am in the moment. I should really book an oil change…

Yeah, my husband says my mind is like a crowded bar on a Friday night with a band playing. He isn’t far off. There is a lot going on in there to the point that I am surprised that I get anything done. No matter how many meditation or mindfulness classes I take I can’t ever seem to achieve that clear mind I have heard so much about. The closest I can get is to picture I am at a beach and I’m focusing on the waves rolling in. Wave rolls in, Wave rolls out. Breathe in, Breathe out to the sound of the ocean in my mind. Even focusing on that is a struggle.

It isn’t that I’m NOT thankful for what I have… I am. I have fought hard to get where I am in life. I have a wonderful husband (who may annoy the hell out of me at times) but I adore him even when he is annoying. I have 2 boys that come with their own challenges…Especially my pre-teen. Uggg…Teenagers. But I love them dearly, even if one of them may be possessed until he finds his true self and the other one is a bottomless pit who is ALWAYS hungry but still skinny despite eating probably 10,000 calories a day. He may be training for an eating competition. I have a roof over my head and a job that pays the bills. I can still get around on my own two feet and still have my vision (with my contacts on) and I can still mostly hear (despite all those concerts in the 1980’s). Overall, I am doing pretty good. But we always want more.

Why is that? I am always working on something. Why settle when I can upgrade with a little more effort? Could I just stay local and enjoy a Stay-cation in El-Backyardo? Absolutely. But why when there is a whole world out there to see full of unique foods and experiences? Why settle when I can work a little harder for an upgrade? I have put in a lot of work to get in shape over the last year why not just settle in and be happy with my new size 16 self? Well, With a little more work I can be a size 14 or 12 or even a 10 (Honestly, I don’t think I have fit a 10 since I was 10). I can weigh that much less and be in much better shape not only look better but feel better as well.

I have learned that I can still be thankful for what I have and what I have accomplished through the years AND still want more. Wanting more does not negate what you already have. You can be thankful that you have a roof over your head while still dreaming that it was by the beach instead of in the suburbs. You can be thankful that you are able to walk the 5K Turkey Trot while wishing you could run it. You can be thankful that you have food you have while wishing you didn’t eat so much.

From my home to yours… I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving!

Preparing For Everest

Wow! It seems so weird that the time is almost here! I started planing this adventure shortly after my 45th birthday. I wanted to do something EPIC for my 50th birthday. I knew something the scale of what I had in mind was going to take some work. I already had my plan to see the Northern Lights but wanted to start work on my epic adventure.

I started by reading some books on the Everest base camp trek. This was back in 2019 just before the pandemic started when I got back from my solo trip to the UK to see Stonehenge and Scotland.

Up next was going to see the Northern lights in Feb 2021… Lets just say that didn’t happen with the pandemic travel restrictions still in full swing. But I eventually got there. I saw the lights dancing accross the sky. I could then focus on my next goal… Everest.

The books I read were on the training and gear needed to make the trek. With all the pandemic restrictions I was watching things closely to see if I could even make it happen especially after my Northern Lights trip got bumped from 2021, to 2022 and finally happened 2023. I finally booked my trek WAY in advance since I was working so much overtime I wanted it to go toward something fun. I booked Everest. With all the overtime I also booked a trip to the UK with my husband as well.

I needed to make some changes. I picked 1 year prior to my trip and put my foot down at work. I started getting in shape. My family and friends freaked out as I told them of my plans. But one thing they all agreed with… You can’t get more epic than Everest.

Of course my Mom wanted to know why I can’t just be normal and go to Hawaii to celebrate my birthday or something. Mom, I have never been that person. You know that. If you want “normal” look at my siblings. I will forever keep you on your toes. What is “normal” anyway? Work, go home, watch TV, go to bed repeat ad-nauseum? Pass.

I want to go new places, see new things and try things I have never tried before. I want to experience other cultures. I don’t mind working hard to do those things either. I am fine with sacrificing some “normal” things for experiences. For example… I don’t have cable and I have not had it since 2005 when I left my ex-husband who cared more about booze, drugs and his TV shows than me. I make my own coffee at home rather than grabbing starbucks on the way to work. I pack my lunch every day. We make dinner at home rather than grabbing take out or going out to eat. Now, I’m not saying that I never go out because we do. It is just the exception rather than the rule.

Back to Everest… Here I am almost 100 lbs lighter. Now I still have a ways to go but I am better than when I started. Lets talk gear… I have needed to acquire some different things for this trip. A special duffel bag for the Sherpas to take from tea house to tea house in Tibet. A special sleeping bag for the tea houses. Water purification tablets, shots, anti altitude sickness medication and antibiotics just incase something gets through my water purification efforts. With my weight loss I have also needed a new coat and new pants. I have gone back and forth between my hiking boots or trail running shoes and I am more comfortable in my trail running shoes so I’ll probably take those. Many places have spotty power so they recommend a battery to charge your devices. I got a solar one just incase it is a while before we find reliable power in the Himalayas. I’ll charge everything up in Kathmandu before I head out to Tibet.

Overall, I think I am set. I will be going through my checklist and starting to pack this week so I have time to get anything else I need. I never pack this early, but when I am going to be so remote that power and clean water are hard to find and it is reccomended that I bring my own toilet paper for the squat toilets and body wipes since showers will be rare. I added in a really cool hand washing bag thing for laundry and my favorite travel clothesline so I can do laundry in the evenings if I have access to water. I like to travel light so I am hoping the laundry bag thing works good. It may come with me on all my trips that are longer than a few days if it works well.

On a training hike with my husband. I’m not sunburnt. I’m hot and hiking in a sundress. We picked the day and got a sitter for the kids. Then the weather was over 100 degrees. We should have just gone kayaking.

Progress Report

So here I am. Almost a year after deciding to change my life and how did I do so far?

The first change I made was to stop working all the overtime. Going from working 6 days a week and 10-12 hours a day to only 40 hours a week like a normal person. A year later I have stuck to my guns and when I am asked to do overtime I simply say I am just one person so maybe they should hire enough staff to work all the hours they need. That has not stopped my job from trying to work us to death in our regular work hours. That lasted up until I injured my shoulder. While investigating this work injury it came out that a job that should be done by at least 6 people is being handled by 2.5 people and 2 of the 3 of us there got pulled to do other things leaving me to cover the work of 6 people and per my many, many emails that is how mistakes get made and how people get injured. With me being on modified while my shoulder heals things have gotten interesting now that other entities have gotten involved and the many, many complaints I have logged in regards to safety in the past years now have come to light. I am hoping that by the end of the year things change to make it a safe work enviroment with a reasonable workload.

The second change I made was to get my health back. Things slipped with me working so much and I wanted to get in shape and get back to exercising again. I’m happy to say that I have done great things there too. With diet and exercise I have lost almost 100 lbs in the last year…OK, I am officially down 97 lbs for a year of hard work, but I’m soooo close to 100 that I’ll just call it 100. I should hit 100 in just another 2-3 weeks. I look and feel so much better even though I still have a long way to go. When I started I could not fasten my size 28 jeans. I am now a solid size 14/16 depending on the brand. My favorite lounge pants are so big on me I can wear them as a strapless romper because the waist comes all the way up to my armpits. I still find it shocking when I get something new and it looks so small but actually fits me perfectly and things that use to fit just fall off. I have turned my favorite old t-shirts into nightshirts. All the bottoms had to go. There was no way to save those. Then I have a bin of favorite dresses and tops that I will alter once I get to my goal.

The only things I have not gotten worked out for my health is a daily yoga practice and a daily skincare routine. But overall, I’m calling the year a win.

I am AWFUL at taking care of my skin. I just wash my face in the shower in the morning. I almost never remember to put on my moisturizer in the morning and I pretty much only remember the evening one maybe once every other month. I am horrible at it. I guess it’s OK since I rarely wear makeup either.

Now in regards to yoga, I LOVE it! I really want to have a daily practice to wind down and stretch in the evenings. I just can’t seem to get it together. For starters, I need a place to practice. We have a great space in our living room, but between my husband, 2 active boys and a german sheppard me pulling out my mat and having a nice, relaxing session just is not going to happen in there. I have tried going into the garage but it is usually in some form of a disaster and the floor is always dirty. So my last option is our bedroom but since I am inside It is just not relaxing because I can hear the kids fighting and my husband yelling at them downstairs and frankly, most of the time it sounds like someone is loosing at Jimunji and the heard of wild animals is running through my house. I’ll figure it out.

So far I have made good progress. As I near my 50th Birthday in October I will be setting more goals for the next year, 5 years and 10 years. Health and wellness is still going to be a focus. I have found a local crochet group and will try to learn to crochet. It is suppose to be good for stress. It will also help with my creative outlet. Along the line of managing my stress I will still try to get that regular yoga practice going. The 3rd thing I will be doing to manage my stress is I will be leaving the gallery. I was at 2 galleries. Then I dropped to 1. Looking at things it is just not a good time for me. Working the monthly shift is super inconvienent as all of the shifts are in the middle of the day. It is a giant time suck at a time when I don’t have much time to spare. So I am letting it go.

I am sticking with my diet and exercise plan. I have enjoyed the hikes while I prepared for Everest so I’ll keep hiking. I’ll also add in more kayaking. That will also be good for stress relief. I love being out in nature on the water and living so close to it I have wanted a kayak since we moved here 8 years ago. I finally got one at the end of the summer as they clear out the summer goods to make room for Christmas.

The whole time I have been typing this out I have been debating on releasing my big secret I have been keeping. As I have been pondering my next steps and what bucket list item I want to tick off my list next I have decided to train for my 1st triathalon. I was going to do it in 2025, but when I was researching what one I wanted to be my 1st I saw one on my actual 50th birthday. The temptation was too much. I signed up and I have kept it quiet. My husband knows, obviously. But with me already getting in shape no one I know has noticed that I tweaked what I was doing to make this possible. I plan on announcing to to the world the day after my birthday. I am already signed up for 4 more races in 2025. The multisport training will help me get and stay in shape and works my whole body so it is right in line with my fitness goals.

I have not forgot travel. My husband and I had a fantastic time in the UK in the spring. I took him outside of his comfort zone and he actually enjoied it. A month after we got back he asked me if I would be OK changing our plans on Hawaii in 2025 to going back to Cabo San Lucas in 2025… Um, yes! He is ready to do it my way so we are staying in a small family owned hotel with I think 8 rooms Where I had to make the reservations in Spanish. The location is awesome and I’m taking my husband outside his comfort zone again to experience a bunch of things he has never done before. I am excited to ramp up his sense of adventure…hopefully.

It isn’t just my husband… I take my kids outside their comfort zones too to try new things as well. They show fear much better than my husband. It isn’t like I drag them out to go skydiving and push them out of the plane or anything. I just taken them to new places and have them try new things. My boys are 9 and 12 now and have their Dad’s sense of adventure. Once they try something they usually have fun.

I still have my long solo trip to Nepal and Tibet coming up soon where I am doing all kinds of things. I’m excited about some of the things I have planned. It is one hell of a way to end my 1st 50 years with an epic adventure that has taken me at least 3 years to plan… and it is quite the epic adventure that I have planned. Then I will start my next 50 years with a triathalon ticking yet one more item off my bucket list with my triathalon.

Overall, not a bad year and I have a lot more adventure coming up.

Welcome 2024!

I am actually fairly happy to see 2023 behind me. It was a hard year, granted I have had worse. 2023 was tough because of how much overtime I worked. I felt as if it stole my life away. I was working 10-12 hours a day Monday-Friday and another 8-10 on Saturday… I did this for 5 months straight. I was completely exhausted at the end in mid-October and didn’t start to feel human again until around Thanksgiving.

It wasn’t all doom and gloom. We did fix up some things around the house and booked a nice trip to the UK for our anniversary in 2024 with the overtime. Pretty much every time I got paid I’d look at how much I made in OT and book another part of the trip so everything is paid in full except food, drink and our train tickets that I can only book 2 months out. It was nice to have something to look forward to while working so much.

With all that extra work some things slipped. I am back on track working on my mental and physical health. I even joined a stress management program. I feel like I lost out on a lot of family time so I have also booked some fun stuff to do with the kids in 2024 as well as an epic solo trip for my 50th birthday in the fall.

I am choosing to be positive as I enter 2024. I have a lot to look forward to as I spend more time with friends and family but I am especially excited about the travel. From the short overnight and day trips with the kids, to taking my husband to the UK for our anniversary (a trip he is very excited about and it will be the farthest he has ever been from home) to my epic birthday trip to see Nepal and Tibet where I will trek to Everest base camp, enjoy a helicopter ride to Annapurna base camp and end with a safari in the Chitwan National Park in Nepal.

Yes, 2024 will be an exciting year.

Bucket List – Grand Canyon

Pretty much everyone I know knows that I am big on setting goals, making a plan and achieving those goals. That includes bucket lists. Everyone should have one. If you don’t, start one. Spend the $0.50 and get a cheap notebook or spend more and get something better, but do it. Some people do electronic but for this I think physical paper is best. There is something very satisfying about actually crossing it off and seeing all you have done.

I started the bucket lists back in the late 80’s early 90’s before a bucket list was a thing. It was just a list of things I wanted to do someday. Through the years I have added things and crossed others off. In some cases my ideas or goals changed as I grew older so I took some items off because they were no longer important to me as an adult. I have lost track of how many lists I have had through the years as notebooks filled or fell apart and I copied my items left to a new book. I have since dedicated a whole page to some items (like see all the California missions and all the California lighthouses) so the goal is at the top and all the items needed to achieve the goal are listed under to be crossed off as I go to them. (A note about the missions…ask for a mission passport in the gift shop at the first one you go to and get the stamps at all the missions as you visit. I went to 4 before I found out about this)

You may wonder what all that has to do with the Grand Canyon…well it has been on my bucket list since I started my bucket list. Then when I went to Vegas for my 21st birthday I saw a brochure for helicopter flights to the Grand Canyon where you actually land inside the canyon, have a picnic then fly out over the Vegas strip at night. OMG I was in LOVE with the idea but that price…ouch. It went on the bucket list where it sat for 26 years.

You read that right…26 years. In May 2022 I finally achieved that goal and it was every bit as amazing as I thought it would be. Flying in over the desert, dropping into the Grand Canyon and flying through below the rim so you can see all the little slot canyons that branch off to the sides… it was every bit as amazing as I dreamed and totally worth waiting 26 years to do rather than just giving up because the price was too high.

The point is no matter what the dream is you can achieve it. It just takes planning and determination. No one needs to know you are working on it. Even if you just put $1 a week into an envelope to save up for something special you will eventually get there. Make a list. Make a plan. Achieve your dreams. Time will go on if you achieve your dreams or not so you may as well be amazing!!

My hubby and I posing for a photo on our anniversary in the Grand Canyon.

Aging and New Beginnings

Recently I seem to be having a lot of conversations with my friends about the future. It seems as if many people are unsure about what to do with the rest of their lives and are rethinking things post-pandemic. Some are looking at changing their jobs, moving somewhere new, going back to school, and starting or ending relationships. We are not talking about small changes, but large ones. Has the pandemic shown us life is too short to not be happy? Are we under more pressure than usual? Or are people just more open to other options and more willing to make changes?

Honestly, it is hard to know. People have always made changes, but it seems like there are more people making big changes than there was pre-pandemic. I get it. Looking at my own life I would love to just uproot and move somewhere else. Living in California, I am so tired of the homeless encampments everywhere, the fires, the horrible road conditions, the poor schools, high cost of living and so many other things that a move to somewhere else sounds like a dream. I also know that I have less than a decade to my house being paid off. I love the beaches, mountains and beauty of the nature areas of this state. I love the availability and variety of fresh produce and the cultural diversity of the area. My job is also here…Although if I get a good enough offer I will be out of that door so fast… So I get the job changes too.

The long term staffing shortages have gotten REALLY old and there is no end in site either. People are now refusing to volunteer for overtime anymore. Management is just accepting it right now…But, I can see the mandatory overtime coming soon again, probably by April. I am not looking forward to that day. The last few times the mandatory period lasted at least 6 months but it seems to run for about 9 months with the holidays free of mandatory overtime in November, December and January. In a dream world, If I can find a job with similar pay and benefits I would leave. If I get offered a job where I can have flexible hours and work remotely I would even be willing to take less money and less time off.

I can see why people are wondering “Where do I go from here?” I can see why they are looking at all areas of their lives and making changes. I have had time to think about my life in the closures and the time after and there are changes I want to make as well even though I am happy overall. Even I can see where there is room for improvement.

To all those pondering a change… I wish you luck and happiness.

Reno

I recently turned 48. I am trying hard to believe that I am no longer young and I am staring down 50 that is approaching faster and faster every day. I have had a rough relationship with celebrating birthdays because for the most part it depends on others and I prefer to be selfish on my birthday and just relax or go somewhere amazing and have a one in a lifetime experience. No one ever actually listens. That changed this year.

Several months ago my husband said “lets get away for your birthday this year” Now I am picturing lounging on a beach somewhere with a tropical drink with a little umbrella in it. He says he will plan everything. It will be amazing. I am a bit worried about this because I am the traveler. I am the planner. It is my thing. He is so excited that I agree to leave it all to him. Then he tells me we are going to Reno, NV.

Reno.

Dirty old Reno.

I hate Reno. I’m a beach person not a desert person and I don’t like the smell of cigarette smoke or gambling. What is he thinking? He is so excited (like a kid on Christmas morning) so I plaster a smile on my face and ask him if he is sure and what he has in mind. Then he tells me that he was watching YouTube videos about the best day spas in the united states and the Peppermill in Reno has one of the top 10 so we should check it out.

Ok, Reno is sounding better now. But, when I was last there in the 1990’s it was not exactly a nice place to go. It lacked the dazzle of Vegas or the natural splendor of Tahoe. I ask him how old this video was that he watched. So he pulls it up. It is recent. Then he pulls up a video of the Peppermill and it is reminiscent of the Belagio or the Venician resorts in Vegas. I am intrigued, but still not excited because, well… it’s still Reno.

A few months go by and he has made all the arrangements. We have childcare covered for the time we are out of town. He made reservations at an Italian restaurant and a steakhouse for our two nights there. We are spending all day in the spa relaxing on my actual birthday getting pampered and relaxing. I’m still skeptical and he is still super excited.

The day finally arrives for us to depart. We load up the car and head out…to Reno. I’m expecting to see beautiful fall color, but no one told the trees. We get to the peppermill and it is busier than I expected to see on a weekday. They are hosting an educational conference for veterinarians. It actually was nice inside. It was super clean. The staff was friendly. Our room was amazing. The food was great. If they were short staffed, it sure didn’t show at all. That was something we have not seen here in California for years. The weather was even perfect. He did an amazing job.

I guess it is time for me to let go, stop being such a control freak and trust that the man I have been married to for 11 years actually knows me pretty well and is capable of planning a trip for us that I will enjoy. Maybe I don’t always have to “do it all”. Maybe I can let go a little and relax and know that everything will be ok.

I know that sounds a little odd. But, I have spent most of my adult life only being able to rely on myself through my first marriage to an alcoholic who cared more about his TV programs and his next drink than me and in my single years. Relying on anyone else almost always led to me being let down and me scrambling at the last minute trying to do it all myself. I forgot what it was like to be able to just let go and know things will be ok. I’m slowly learning to let go and accept that others are capable of doing things too. I do not have to always carry the burden. I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks.

New Year – New you – 2023

I have not made any secrets that 2021 was rough on me, particularly all the overtime. Everything kinda fell apart as I struggled with 60+ hour weeks. That ended up with me off work on stress leave and struggling to get my life under control.

The year ended with packed schedules triple booked to try to get patients seen before I’m off work for a couple months for carpal tunnel surgery. We knew it was going to be hard on my co worker and myself but it was best to do what we could…then she got covid. I then had a completely unrealistic schedule and now I have to cover her as well. Let’s just say it was tough.

In light of the hideous work schedules, stress and my overall health I decided to make 2022 the year of me! No more putting myself last. I started off my year by finally having my carpal tunnel taken care of. Then planned on using my time off to reset my life and get back on track. Well, it kinda went off track pretty quickly. Now There were some great times, but there was a lot of really bad too.

2022 was a mixed bag, good with the bad. One of my best friends died suddenly in February. It was awful and heartbreaking to take her off life support but I was thankful that I was off work recovering from my carpal tunnel surgery so I was able to be there her last days and as she passed. I was also able to help sort through her things with her brother and boyfriend and be there when we laid her ashes to rest in one of her favorite places in the world. Should I have been at work getting off work for that would have been difficult with how short handed we are.

That was followed by me having a severe reaction to my mandatory covid booster. I am a big believer in vaccines and they do save lives. but I am against mandatory vaccinations. I believe that health decisions should be up to an individual and their MD. This was my view since before the first mandates. I voluntarily got my first 2 covid vaccines and I reacted to the first one and worse to the second one. I had no intentions of getting a booster due to how bad i felt after the 2nd shot. But I work in healthcare and our governor feels that everyone who works in healthcare must get a mandatory booster too or loose their jobs. No one else in the state needs to even be vaccinated and it is even optional for state employees but if you work in healthcare it is mandatory, not by our employers (who just recommended it, but it was not mandatory) but by the state that mandated it. Well, I reacted and even worse than my first two shots. To the point that I am lucky to be alive now. Near death or death is the only way to qualify for an exemption (my reaction to shot 2 was bad, but not bad enough to qualify for the exemption under the mandate) so I now am exempt for any further mandatory vaccine because if I get one again it will probably kill me. So yippie for not dying.

To take the good with the bad, It was actually fortunate that I was off work with my carpal tunnel surgery so I had time to get my health under control for the most part before returning to work. Was not at 100% but at least I was at probably 80% by the time I went back to work. Without that time off it would have been near impossible to fir in all the testing and appointments I had at the beginning to figure out just how extensive the problems were and get them under control. I had appointments almost every day for a few weeks, sometimes I had multiple appointments in a day. By the time I got back to work I only had appointments about once a week. Now I am doing much better and only have appointments every couple months and lab work. No one knows if I have to worry about future flare ups or other complications or anything because the vaccine is so new. But hey, I am still here.

Now 2022 was not all doom and gloom. I did have some good points. I had a couple road trips with some friends. I reconnected with an old friend that moved away a few years ago. I also checked off a bucket list item that has sat on that list for 26 years. It was just as amazing as I dreamed it would be.

So where does that leave me for 2023?

In 2023 I am again trying to focus on my health…again. I will be working on getting in shape and managing my stress. I will also be checking another item off my bucket list and finally seeing the Northern Lights in February. I was suppose to go in February of 2021, but it got bumped to 2022 then 2023 because of Covid. I was starting to feel like it may never actually happen. But I am very excited that it looks like it is actually going to happen in 2023!

My husband and I had a talk just before New Years about our goals and wishes for the upcoming years. I am excited for the plans we have made. We are both looking forward to a healthy, rewarding 2023 and an even better 2024.

From our home to yours… Happy new year everyone! May 2023 be the best one yet!